My first appointment this week is a man, late 50’s, highly educated, divorced, grown children, and his long term goal is “absolutely” to be married. He was married for over 30 years, he is a strong believer, and marriage is the only long term option with the right person.
He is active and fit, rides his bike to work occasionally and frequently does a bike ride during his lunch time. He also enjoys kayaking, horseback riding, skiing, spending time with his friends, dinner parties, wine tastings, and cooking. He loves live theater and the performing arts and has seen many shows on Broadway.
He said “I have a group of close male friends and we enjoy getting together once or twice a month. I would like for my partner to be supportive of my friendships with others and hopefully she also has friends who are important in her life.”
He is attracted to a lady who is fit and trim, charming and graceful. He is comfortable dating someone a few years older if she enjoys an active, healthy lifestyle.
One of the reasons he decided to call me was because he has tried a few of the online services and is tired of wasting his time.
He said “It has happened a couple of times that I meet someone, we enjoy a few hours together, the conversation flows, we laugh, have fun, they seem like a good fit for me and then I never hear from them again. I don’t know what I am doing wrong.”
I said “Probably the only thing wrong is that you are not meeting the right ladies. If someone is not interested in seeing you again 99 out of 100 times it is because they don’t feel the physical attraction. It is easier for most people to just blow it off or ignore someone than to tell them they don’t feel attracted to them. You are an attractive man but you are very slim and women are usually more comfortable with men who are bigger than they are, sometimes MUCH bigger than they are.”
He said “I have been the same size all my life and I am very healthy. It is what it is.”
I said “That is another way I screen for you. I know the ladies who will be comfortable with your size.”
He said “OK, Donna, my love life is in your hands and I am counting on you.”
I said “I can take the pressure…it’s my job.”
The second new client this week is a lady, mid 30’s, divorced, educated, her long term goal is marriage and children. She has tried the online services as well and has many of the same complaints that most people have about online dating; time consuming, ineffective, people aren’t honest, they don’t look like their pictures and they don’t live here.
Nine years ago when she married she felt like she had all the time in the world to have kids but, today she does not have that luxury and she definitely wants to have kids. She also called me because she is tired of wasting her time meeting the wrong men.
She enjoys camping, rock climbing, snow and water skiing, and she loves to travel. She has been to Australia, Barbados, Puerto Rico, Mexico, Hawaii, and Ireland. She would love to go to Peru with someone special….perhaps on a honeymoon.
When I asked her on a scale of “0” to “10” how important the physical attraction is she said “They are all a “6” until they open their mouth and then it can go up or down pretty quickly from there.” She is very open on her preferences as far as height, age, and race. The only somewhat limiting preference she has is to meet someone who does not have kids, and, of course, wants kids.
She said “I guess most men in this age range have kids so I don’t want to limit myself by saying absolutely no kids.”
I said “We will start with the men who do not have kids but if I have a good match who has one child and is still open to having more, would you want to hear about him.”
She said “Sure.” She is very easy going, on a scale of “0” to “10”, she is a “9”.
She said “Sometimes being so easy going works against me.”
I said “I can help you with that as we work together to find someone who appreciates that about you and does not take advantage of your kind nature.”
It’s not easy being easy.
My last interview for this year will be on Monday. A fellow I have been playing phone tag with wants to take advantage of my offer of 50% off my regular programs until the end of the year. I was not planning on working on Monday but the interview is my favorite part of matchmaking and I cannot resist adding one more new client for 2012.
I think 2013 is going to be a great year for Perfectly Matched. My new biweekly column in the Gazette has definitely generated new activity. I have a full page ad in this month’s Style magazine. I start advertising in the Women’s Edition next month and I have begun working with another matchmaker in the Denver area to increase the options for both of our clients. I am also learning more and more about how to make social media work for me and my clients. Of course referral business is always my best source of new clients. I love that my clients continue to keep me in business!
I can’t wait for 2013 to begin!!!!!
To be continued…………………………………