Dear Donna: January 15th, 2020

Dear Donna,

I have been married three times and divorced this last time for two years.

I know I don't want to live alone for the rest of my life and I feel I am ready to be in a relationship but I don't trust myself and my judgement when it comes to finding the right woman. To say my picker is broken is an understatement.

One of the common denominators in all my marriages is that I basically rescued all of them financially. I have plenty of money and did not mind sharing it with them but I don't want to make the same mistake again.

How can I know if someone is being genuine about liking me and not just interested in my money? I am in my 70's and I want to get this right the next, and hopefully, last time.

Paul

Dear Paul,

Look for someone who does not need to be rescued financially. When I make a match I pay attention to compatible income levels. Compatible income levels means you can make similar life style choices.

If you don't want to attract women who are only interested in you for your money, don't lead with your money. In other words, don't be throwing your money around to get their attention and then be surprised when they are more interested in your money than you.

You are in an age range where I have plenty of activity for a man and you live in Colorado Springs.

Why don't you take my free profile test at www.perfectlymatcheddating.com or call me at 719-260-1000 and let me help you.

I have some great, quality, financially secure ladies who might just be waiting for you to walk through my door.

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Dear Donna,

My ex-husband and I have been divorced for 12 years. We both remarried and I have been divorced from my second husband for three years.

My first ex-husband is going through a divorce and was recently in town to visit our daughter. We had a real heart to heart conversation and he let me know he is interested in seeing me when he comes to visit next month.

He has been sending me flirty texts and saying he is looking forward to seeing me again.

I cannot believe I am even considering this but I have not come close to meeting anyone else I think would work for me and maybe this is as good as it's going to get. The problem is, I don't feel attracted to him anymore but I am tired of being alone. What do you think?

Lisa

Dear Lisa,

Your first ex-husband is going through a divorce and it is unlikely he is emotionally available and in the right frame of mind to get involved with someone new, especially his ex-wife.

Honestly, you sound like you are settling because that is easier than continuing to try to find the right man which you are concerned you may never find. And he is doing what so many people do when a relationship or marriage ends and looking backwards.

The bottom line, he is not emotionally available and you are not attracted to him. Would you want someone to settle for you if they weren't attracted to you?

Do yourself and him and your daughter a huge favor and don't encourage him.

Trust me, finding the right man is going to be easier than giving your ex-husband another try.