January 5, 2016

I am glad the holidays are over and we can get back to life as usual. I am no Scrooge but I have been around long enough to see the holidays go from one week a month to consuming the entire month. And you know what that’s all about, merchandisers sucking us all in to spending money. Next year, which is this year, I am going to start a campaign to keep Thanksgiving and Christmas to one week, like the good old days.

Speaking of getting back to life as usual, one of my first conversations today was with a man who told me that the reason he is not successful in relationships is because he is a nice guy and “we all know nice guys finish last”.
In 30 years of matchmaking this is probably the one quote I hear more than any other. I have had plenty of time and experience to consider whether or not that is a true statement and it is, but it is just as true to say “nice girls finish last”.
This has more to do with temperament than gender. With the Profile test I use I know everyone’s temperament score and this can apply to people who are a 7 to 10 in temperament, very easy going. It does not apply to all people with those scores because your upbringing, more than anything else, your life experiences and your relationship experiences are also determining factors.

The reason nice people finish last is because they put everyone else’s feelings before their own. When you do that, you are bound to finish last. They are compassionate and kind hearted and give people the benefit of the doubt until there is no more doubt. However, there is a fine line between easy going and wimpy. Wimpy is when everyone who cares about you tells you that you are being taken advantage of, disrespected and used. Putting someone else’s feeling before your own will only work if they are reciprocating and putting your feelings before theirs.

New Years Eve I was out to dinner and a young man came up to me and said “Hi, Donna. Do you remember me?” He became a client a little over a year ago. He liked the first lady I matched him with and they got married in October.
He said “We were waiting for our wedding pictures to come back and we were going to send you a picture to let you know.”
He walked me over to where they were sitting and she said “We were waiting for our wedding pictures and we were going to send you one.”
She was a client for 5 years and her mother encouraged her to call me. I actually had a couple of conversations with her mother over the years and she said “Don’t give up on my daughter. She’s picky but I think you will find the right person for her.” Her mother was right.

Happy New Year! If you are interested in meeting someone special who is also looking to meet someone special give me a call at 719-260-1000 or start by taking my free profile test at www.perfectlymatcheddating.com and I will call you with YOUR scores.