January 31, 2012

My first appointment today is a client coming in to reconnect and let me take a new picture. He has been on a weight lifting and diet program to help gain weight and build muscle. He has put on 20 pounds in the last three months. What a difference it makes in his appearance. He looks great! Woman are always more comfortable with men who are bigger, and he will now have more options as far as matches are concerned. This fellow is a real go getter and succeeds in everything he sets his mind to do. The program he is on does not sound easy, but he is sticking with it and the results are amazing.

My second appointment is a “be back”, a lady I interviewed four years ago, decided now was the time to join Perfectly Matched. I retested her and her scores did not change more than a half a point in any of the six areas of compatibility, which is not surprising. I asked her why she decided to give my service a try and she said “I have been on one of the online dating services and it has been a joke. The men I met misrepresented themselves and outright lied about so many things it was ridiculous. One of the last men I met said he was a runner and when we met he was overweight and walked with a limp. He admitted he had not been running lately. I also remember you pulling out one folder after another of men you thought were good matches for me. I was impressed with the men you mentioned and that you don’t use a computer to make matches.”

She is mid 40’s, divorced, her long term goal is a serious relationship and she would prefer to be married again, but is also open to other options. She IS a runner, and also enjoys hiking, camping, fishing, downhill skiing occasionally, and she is a huge Dallas Cowboy fan. She is close to her family and siblings, and someone who is also close to his family would be a real plus.

She is easy going and has a tendency to stay in relationships longer than she should because she always gives the men the benefit of the doubt and puts their wants and needs before her own. I said “I will help you with that as we work together and remind you that you should put yourself first and ask not what you can do for them, but how do they work for you.”
She shook her head, smiled and said “I have a hard time doing that.” In her last relationship she felt she was constantly lifting him up and dealing with his negative attitude. It wore her out.
She said “Another reason I came back to you is I think men who invest in your service are serious about finding the right person, and, so far, I have not done a very good job of choosing for myself.”
I told her many people have that problem because most of us base our choice on physical attraction and think because that chemistry and attraction is there everything else will fall into place.
What I do at Perfectly Matched is just the opposite. I start with the things that matter and then ADD the mutual physical attraction. When people meet and there is a mutual attraction, there is so much more potential for success.

She is really funny, too, with a quick, dry sense of humor. She said “I spent a lot of time on your website and one of the things you said that resonated with me was, ‘ the ones that start fast, end fast.’ In the next relationship, I am going to take the stairs instead of the elevator.” She also liked my suggestion of “no sex for the first three months.”

She is tall, thin, fit, smart, pretty, sweet, down to earth, and four years later, I still have some great matches for her.

I had to give the “teeth talk” again today. FYI, teeth are the one physical attribute that both men and women seem to notice first. There is no reason today to not have white teeth. It’s easy and affordable. I should get a kickback from Crest for all the people I have sent to buy their Crest Strips. For most people, fourteen days later, white teeth. Go to the mirror, smile, and see if you could benefit from a quick trip to the grocery store. It can make a big difference!

To be continued………